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First dates can be incredibly nerve-wracking, especially regarding a budding relationship between two people.
Even though you might consider yourself to be a gentleman and have your best intentions at heart, sometimes there are certain behaviors or attitudes that you exude on the first date that scare off potential partners without even realizing it!
Here is our comprehensive guide of all the things men do on their first dates that make women cringe – so take note if you don’t want your new romance to end after one night!
#1. Being Cheap
Were you considering skimping on the first date to save a few bucks? Think again.
Being cheap on the first date is a major turn-off for women.
It sends the message that you are unwilling to make an effort or invest in getting to know them.
It’s not about how much money you spend but more about your effort.
A simple picnic or a walk in the park can go a long way if it’s planned out and thoughtful.
But making reservations at a fancy restaurant, then asking your date to only order items priced below $20, and having a coupon is a major turn-off.
#2. Talking Excessively About Your Ex
Have you ever been on a first date when the guy starts talking about his ex? And talking. And talking.
While it is normal to mention a past relationship or give some details about it, a guy who can’t stop talking about their ex on a first date is a major red flag for women.
It’s uncomfortable and raises questions about whether you’re ready to move on and invest in a new relationship.
#3. Being Rude To Others
The anticipation of a first date is a unique feeling. You have no idea if it will be a waste of your time or if you are meeting the person you will spend the rest of your life with.
As much as we want it to be the love of our lives, too often, the guy ends up being a jerk.
Your date walks in, throwing shade while criticizing your fashion, food, and even your favorite movie choices.
Being rude to someone on the first date is like an instant mood killer.
For women, the stakes are higher. It’s no secret that women prioritize safety over many things in life, including a second date.
#4. Not Listening
The first date can be nerve-wracking for both parties involved.
However, one behavior sends women running for the hills: not listening.
Women desire a connection and want to feel heard and understood.
A man who fails to listen on the first date is communicating that he doesn’t value her thoughts or opinions.
This can be a huge turn-off and may leave a woman feeling unimportant and dismissed.
Furthermore, women want to feel safe and secure with someone they are considering dating.
A man who doesn’t listen on the first date sends red flags that he may be self-absorbed or lack empathy.
#5. Being Clingy
Nothing is worse than having a great first date only to find out the guy is clingy.
This generally shows up with never-ending text messages afterward, talking about the great time he had, when you can get together again, and so on.
It might even move into his plans for the next few days.
While there is an expectation to follow up after a first date, it is not a great look to send multiple messages.
#6. Always Focusing On The Negative
As important as it is to be honest on a first date, focusing solely on the negative aspects of your life can send potential partners running for the hills.
While being honest about your struggles and shortcomings can be a way to connect with someone on a deeper level, constantly dwelling on the bad can create an atmosphere of negativity that leaves women feeling drained and overwhelmed.
#7. Be Overly Aggressive
Have you ever gone on a date you were excited about, only to find out the other person is too aggressive?
They’re loud, aggressive, and unfiltered. They say things that make you cringe and do things that make you want to run away.
It’s as if they’re trying to impress you but failing miserably.
This behavior may seem confident to some, but it’s a definite turn-off for many women.
When it comes to dating, it’s all about balance. Too little effort, and you come across as disinterested. Too much, and you scare the other person away.
#8. Ignoring Boundaries
Regarding first dates, there’s nothing more important than setting boundaries.
Unfortunately, some people can’t seem to grasp this concept.
Ignoring boundaries is a surefire way to scare women away and for good reason.
Imagine going out with someone for the first time only to have them constantly invade your personal space or ask personal and uncomfortable questions.
It’s enough to make anyone feel uneasy.
#9. Being Excessively Late
First date jitters are only natural, but one thing sends shivers down most women’s spines: being excessively late.
It’s not just a matter of etiquette or being fashionably late; it’s a red flag.
Being extremely tardy sends a message that you don’t value your date’s time or effort.
It shows disorganization and irresponsibility, two traits that don’t exactly scream “stable partner.”
#10. Making The Date About Yourself
When it comes to first dates, it’s natural to want to put your best foot forward and shine brightly like a star.
However, there’s a fine line between confidently showing off your personality and making the entire date revolve around you.
Unfortunately, many women find it off-putting when their date hogs the spotlight and fails to show genuine interest in getting to know them.
It’s important to remember that a successful date is a two-way street where both people feel valued and heard.
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Don Dulin is the founder and main author on Unfinished Success, a personal development website whose goal is to help you be the best you. By making small changes everyday to how you live life, you can live your best life. You can learn more about him here.